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Erap 26
Because of his poor sense of rumor, funny lines must be created for him to maintain his popularity in a world of comedy he inadvertently inspired. He may have laughs of his own yet contrary to beliefs, he's in his true lucid interval at all times that sober and seriousness of his likelihood defeats the purpose of his well-being. If he can't laugh at his own jokes, he must laugh at his ageless pokes.
Kung siya'y naglalakad, anong nauuna sa kanya bukod sa bilog niyang tiyan?
Sagot :
Ang paghi-Erap niya,
Erap ngumiti
Erap magsalita
Erap huminga
Erap tumawa
Erap mag-inglis
Erap umiwas sa impromptu media interview.
Erap proudly broke to pieces the clicked gadget of his newly bought computer. He thought he caught and killed the mouse.
While login in online, the computer asked for his password. Erap painstakingly typed it several times but retorted, "Manufacturer's defect ito, bakit lumalabas na puro x?"
He insistently squeezed ten 1000 peso bills on the CD/DVD-ROM insert, went online and clicked on the word, "SEND" for Jinggoy with a message, "Cold cash now sent this minute. I downloaded it, it's easy."
What's Erap's favorite sports?
Sagot : Discuss Throw.
Erap claims, "Because I love arguments and debates."
What's his least favorite sports?
Sagot : Swimming �..
1. Because no swimming trunks fit into him. (Mag-bloomer na siya!)
2. Because he might be mistaken for butete. (Buntis size talaga!)
3. Because he's scared that he might swallow water instead of alcohol.
4. Because he might drown and prick his tummy by sea urchins. (poor urchins)
What's his tolerable sports?
Sagot : Chess�. Because he pretends to be in deep thought for hours although he has no taught at all.
What's his secret sports?
Sagot : Beauty Contest�.. Because he watches the swimsuit category in belief that he can learn to swim.
What's his excusable sports?
Sagot : Beerhouses and nightclubs.
Erap while giving a speech suddenly develops abdominal pains. The ambulance rushes him to the hospital. Series of specialists were around to give his own opinion after the examination:
Medical MD examined him, thought he has liver cirrhosis, suggested Erap needs liver transplant.
Surgeon is summoned, thought Erap needs liposuction bad. His private part needs tungkod.
Orthopedics noticed his duck walk, thought Erap needs cast to correct his unsteady gait.
Neurologist evaluated him, said, "Wala ka ng pag-asa!"
Psychiatrist interviewed him, declared, "Grow up!"
Obstetrician diagnosed him that he might be "Ripley's Believe It Or Not" pregnant.
Dr Loi signed him out of the hospital, "Iutot mo na, hangin lang yan."
Arbularlyo, "Ito na ang mga hinihingi mong isang kilong pork, isang case ng beer at gin, tuba, isang gallon ice cream, pulutang taba ng baka at tupa. Ibabalik ko na ang alaga mong butete. BUTETE!!!"
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