Subject: [Bayani.com Balita] #42
Date: Mon, 01 Nov 1999 19:02:54 +0800
From: Super Perez <super@bayani.com>
Reply-To: sulat@bayani.com
To: bayanibalita@egroups.com
Kaibigan,
Mabuhay!
Kung pinadalhan kayo ng email na galing sa Egroups.com,
huwag kayong mabahala. Susubukan ko po ang serbisyo nila at
baka makatipid ako ng kaunti. Ang dami na kasi at lagpas
isang oras ang nauubos tuwing magpapadala ng balita. Kung
okay ito e di mas mapapadalas ang padala ng balita.
Tandaan niyo po na ang mas importanteng araw na magpunta ay
sa araw ng patay sa Nov.2 at hindi sa All Saints day sa
Nov.1. Kapansin-pansin po na mas walang tao sa 2 kung
kailan mas angkop na magpunta sa sementeryo. Kung malayo
kayo, magpunta lang sa simbahan at ipagdasal ang mga
minamahal na yumao na. Yung mga hindi naman makapagdasal sa
simbahan dahil walang simbahan (gaya ng mga nasa ibang
bansang bawal ang ibang relihiyon), magtirik ng kandila sa
kuwarto at doon magdasal.
O sige na po. Eto na ang unang mga patawa at kung ano-ano pa
na dadaan sa egroups.
===============
Erap is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the
question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of
inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the
window. He then removes his shirt and throws it away as
well. His pants, socks and watch follow suit.
The nurse, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going
on. "Miss, I am only following the instructions," he says,
"it says here, "Answer the following questions in brief'."
++++++++
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++++++++
Erap just arrived from the Philippines for a summit meeting
with Bill abd Boris in New York City. Bill & Boris were on a
drinking binge that they lost track of the time of the day.
When they came to meet Erap they ask him if the bright thing
in the sky was either the sun or the moon. Erap shyly
muttered:" Sorry folks, I'm not from this place,
I just arrived"
++++++++
Once Erap was filling up an application form for a job. He
promptly filled the columns titled NAME, AGE, ADDRESS etc.
Then he the column SEX. He was not sure as to what to be
filled there. After much thought
he wrote THRICE A WEEK. On seeing this in his application.
form, he was told that it was wrong and what they wanted it
to be filled was either MALE or FEMALE. Again Erap thought
for a long time before coming up with the answer PREFERABLY
FEMALES.
Padala ni Ariel Morales
===============
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(http://www.perezoptical.com). Mag-email sa
info@perezoptical.com o magpunta sa
http://perezoptical.com/discount.htm para sa discount
coupon.
===============
Our Philippine president attended the United Nations'
Meeting. All nations were discussing about space exploration
by the year 2000. Here are some of the conversations:
CHINA DELEGATE:"By the year 2000, China will start their
moon exploration project. "
RUSSIAN DELEGATE:" We too, we are going to explore the moon.
This time we will see to it that our cosmonauts will step on
the moon."
BILL CLINTON: " We the United States will also explore the
moon for the second time."
ERAP:" By the year 2000, the Philippines will explore the
sun."
There was a long silence, Bill Clinton stood up and asked
the Philippine President:
" Isn't it too hot to explore the sun?"
ERAP:( after a long silence replied: " We will do it in the
evening."
+++++++++
Every one knows that President Erap is superstitious. While
he was in Kuala Lumpur for the APEC meeting, he is asked by
Filipino reporters if he’s going back to the Philippines on
Saturday. He looks at the calendar but misreads the date.
"Hindi, ayoko. Friday the 13th pala sa Sabado".
++++++++++
Estrellita Bituin had a hard time breathing and Erap called
911 right away. The 911 operator told Erap that she would
send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the
operator.
Erap replied, "at the end of Eucalyptus Drive."
The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me."
After a long pause, Erap said "How about I drag her over to
Oak Street, and you pick her up there."
Padala ni Ariel Morales
=================
For Sale - Murang-mura - Kaya Lang ...
1) Eyemo (3 pesos lang) gamot sa mata w/ 2 variants:
pwedeng de-roll-on o kaya e de-spray.
2) Flashlight (5 pesos lang),
solar-powered
3) Swatch watch (10 pesos lang),
kaya lang ang batterya e batterya ng kotse.
4) Melodramatic Fool's Dictionary (5 pesos lang),
mga 500 pages pero di naka-arrange alphabetically.
5) Computer Keyboard (20 pesos lang) brand new,
2 klase: japanese or arabic characters yung nakalagay.
6)Electric Fan (10 pesos lang),
ang elesi ay elesi ng helicopter.
Padala ni Melodramatic fool
Nakalista sa http://www.bayani.com/patawa
__
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Inyong lingkod,
Super Perez
Tagapamahala
http://www.bayani.com
http://www.bayani.com/balitaan - Balitaan sa Bayani.com
http://www.bayani.com/kuta - mga kuwento, egroups at iba pa
http://www.bayani.com/aklatan - Bilihan ng libro
http://www.bayani.com/patawa - Patawang Pinoy
http://www.bayani.com/card - Bayani.com Ecard
http://www.philshopping.com - mga bilihing sariling atin
http://www.philshopping.com/classifieds - Libreng Classified
ads
http://www.1hunt.com - The first place to look
mailto:pinoyjokes-subscribe@egroups.com - para sa mga medyo
bastos na patawa
mailto:bayani-subscribe@egroups.com - para makilahok sa
usapang bayan
mailto:sulat@bayani.com - para sumali o magimbita ng
kaibigan (o magpatanggal sa listahan)
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